Going Under
by l-xFaTaLx-l
Summary: Hermione thinks about all she's done for Harry and finally decides to confront him about her feelings. One shot!


**Title: **Going Under****

**Disclaimer:** Harry Potter and all related characters, names, etc. are property of J.K. Rowling, all publishers concerned and Warner Brothers. The only things owned by the author are the plot and any names not featured in the official Harry Potter books or movies. No money is being made from this, and no copyright infringement is intended.

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_Now I will tell you what I've done for you_

_Fifty thousand tears I've cried_

_Screaming deceiving and bleeding for you_

_And you still won't hear me_

It was the end of seventh year and the Wizarding world was celebrating the defeat of the Dark Lord. Up in the Gryffindor dormitory, however, one particular seventh year girl was not so happy. Not pleased at all. Her life was never going to change. She had done so much for him, but she would always be his best friend. She'd done so much for him. She'd cried, even before she'd met him. She'd read all those books about the Boy Who Lived and she'd felt sympathy. And even after that, she'd helped him. She'd always helped him. She peered down at her parchment and skimmed through it.

Checklist:

First year – She'd helped with the Devil's Snare and the Potions bottle.

Second year – She'd figured out the mystery of the basilisk and the Chamber of Secrets.

Third year – She'd been the one to look out for him, and she'd been the one who'd risked using the time-turner to save Sirius.

Fourth year – She'd believed him when no one else had about the Triwizard Tournament. She'd helped him prepare for each task. She'd hardly been able to breath when she'd seen Harry lying on the floor in that maze.

Fifth year – She'd warned him. She'd warned him about the Department of Mysteries. She'd told him it was all a scam.

Sixth year – She'd warned him once again. She'd told him not to let his anger take him over.

Seventh year – She'd been right there with him when he'd gone face to face with the Dark Lord.

Yet still, she was his best friend. It was rather selfish of her to do that – make a list of all the things she's done for him, but love could do that to people.

_Don't want your hand this time I'll save myself_

_Maybe I'll wake up for once_

_Not tormented daily defeated by you_

_Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom_

_I'm dying again_

It really wasn't fair. She'd fallen for him one, twice, and more times than she could count. Each time, it was as if she was going into the pits of hell and time seemed to slow down. She'd coaxed herself to forget about him each time. She'd forced herself to find other love interests but none had matched up to him, and she hadn't even dated him.

It had been just two days ago, that she'd thought, maybe, just maybe her obsession was over. But here she was, brooding over the prospect of their love. Love. It was like a drug she took from time to time. Every time was different. And every time she'd saved herself from getting hurt. Every time, she'd stopped herself from telling him.

She stood up, determined this time, but then her gaze faltered as she remembered how many other times there had been when she'd been determined. No. This was the time. She was going to do it this time. She was going to tell him, whether he liked it or not. Whether he returned her love or not. She was going to tell him. She had to tell him.

She was dying. She was dying deep inside. Her heart was aching and aching. She had to get it over with. She stood up and then opened the door leading to the common room. She noticed it was full of people, and laughter. People playing chess and exploding snap, some leaving to enjoy the sunshine outdoors. But no where in the crowd did she find the person she was looking for. She knew just where to check. She exited the common room without so much as a word to her roommates.

I'm going under 

_Drowning in you_

_I'm falling forever_

_I've got to break through_

_I'm going under_

She walked through the halls of Hogwarts, thinking over things. Rehearsing her speech, but there was nothing. What was she supposed to say him? She loved him and she wanted to be with him, but it was alright if he didn't think of her that way because they could just be friends. What a lie that was. She did not want to just be friends. They'd been friends long enough. She was so deep into his love it was as if she was drowning. She'd drowned already, and it wasn't fair to not give him a chance to drown, not was it? She smiled. He would get his chance. He would definitely get his chance. If she was feeling this, then there was no way she was going to let him go by without thinking about it.

She reached the tapestry and took out the key. She drew out the design on the tapestry with the key that would open the door, and open it did. She had been correct. He was there, slumped against the couch, watching the fire blaze. He was thinking. He was always thinking when he watched the fire.

She took a step inside and the gateway sealed itself. This was always where he would come. This little room in the whole castle that Dumbledore had vacated for them, for studies since they were Head Boy and Girl.

She tip-toed over to the fire, so as not to distract him, but she'd seen him blink, which meant that he'd noticed. She walked over to the couch and took a seat on the other side. This was her chance. This was her moment.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked, thinking it was probably a good start. Find out what's bothering him first, and then say what you've got to say.

"Nothing. I was just thinking. What do I do now? I've killed him. What do I do now? This was what I was here for, wasn't it? Now what do it do?" He said, his face devoid of emotion.

_Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies_

_So I don't know what's real and what's not_

_Always confusing the thoughts in my head_

_So I can't trust myself anymore_

I'm dying again 

Her eyes blurred as tears came into her eyes. She couldn't cry now. She was her to declare her love. She could not cry. Did she really love him? Uh-oh. There was a last minute thought. Did she love him? Good Lord. This was not good. How could she not love him? She'd only been thinking about this for so long, how could she not love him? She slapped herself upside the head.

Her mind was a jumble of thoughts, really. How could she doubt her love?

"You need to calm down. You should feel proud of yourself. You should be celebrating. You can't stay cooped up in here," she said.

"Yeah, but what's the point? I mean, this is basically the end of life for me. What'll happen? I don't even know what I want to be. I'm too tired of this Dark Arts stuff to be an Auror and Quidditch just isn't fun anymore," he sighed.

"Don't say that," was all she could say.

He turned his head, and their eyes met. She held her brown her to his, their gazes transfixed. It was like x-ray. They were both looking through each other to find their inner thoughts, but both of them were rather talented at hiding their emotions.

Simultaneously, the both turned towards the fire, as if they were afraid. Well, she was afraid. She was afraid of his thoughts and her thoughts. She was dying all over again. It hurt. She had seen the hurt in his eyes, and it hurt her too.

"I'm here for you," she whispered.

"I know," he whispered.

This was the moment. She leaned forward and gently pressed her lips to his. It was heaven. Those two seconds, were heaven. She pulled back, slowly, reminding herself she loved him.

"I love you," she whispered and waited with baited breath.

_I'm going under_

_Drowning in you_

_I'm falling forever_

_I've got to break through_

She'd done it. She had declared her love. She had told him. After all these years, and all that pain, she'd told him. And now she would wait. She had to wait. He had to say something.

She could see the surprise on his face, as she had said the magic words. And now she watched as his eyes scanned the room, looking everywhere but at her. What was he thinking? Her breathing stopped as his eyes landed on her. She just stopped breathing. For how long, she didn't know, but it felt like she was drowning. She took in a deep breath as her time elapsed and caught the air in her lungs. It felt like knives. Knives stabbing her.

She had to breathe more. By now, his eyes had diverted on to the fire again and she just sat there, thinking about the choice she'd made. She'd told him, and still, the words were hanging between them. No response. No looks. Looks were deadly. He'd nearly killed her just two seconds ago.

She waited. Time passed and still she waited. She was not going to leave without an answer, even if it was a no. She wanted – no, she needed – an answer. Hermione repositioned herself and sighed, staring at the dying fire. The sky outside had darkened a bit. It had been hours of silence, but she was determined to stay.

_So go on and scream_

_Scream at me I'm so far away_

_I won't be broken again_

_I've got to breathe I can't keep going under_

She just waited. It didn't matter what he did. He was going to talk, no matter what. She wanted him to scream at her, to just break her. To yell at her, to deny her the love. But instead, he'd taken to neglecting her and that hurt.

He wasn't saying anything. She wasn't about to give up though, but her patience was reaching its height.

It was dark now, and her stomach grumbled out of starvation. She hadn't eaten anything for two days, and she had no desire to now. His answer would be filling enough.

Finally, she stood up and stomped her foot, "Harry! Will you say something? Just say something! I don't care if you want to say no! I don't care if you want to say that you don't love me and we should be friends! I don't _care_! Just say _something_! I want an_ answer_! I'm not going to spend the night here, you know! Just get it over with! You've broken me enough times already, it won't hurt now!"

He was still quiet. He was still not speaking and that outraged her! She turned on her heel, and made her way over to the tapestry. She needed some air. She was about to step through the barrier, when something caught her wrist.

She turned back to look at him, staring at her, his eyes pleading. She knew what he was asking and the power of those eyes was so strong that she let him lead her over back to the couch.

She suddenly realized, she already knew. She knew the truth. She knew since the time hours ago, when he'd accidentally set his eyes on her after she'd told him she loved him. He'd been scared. He'd been scared of revealing his thoughts.

Snuggled together on the couch, and Hermione whispered, "I love you too."

**Finis**


End file.
